Monday July 22, 2019
It is difficult to determine the most difficult thing about being the military spouse of someone who is away fighting for his or her country. There is the fear that the loved one will be wounded or worse, the loneliness, and the agony of being separated for long periods of time.
One thing that seems to help the most is to keep in contact by any means possible. If this means writing letters, do that, but hopefully, you can both use your electronic devices to have a virtual, face-to-face conversation when the connectivity allows it.
Some Things to Help with Those Long, Lonely Hours Apart
- Start a new project that will keep you interested and engaged for months. This might be joining a gym or fitness program, taking up a new sport, getting into antiquing, signing up for classes to learn something new, or volunteering in a community organization that does something you really care about. Look online to find all the opportunities available in your area. One of them is sure to be a good fit for your talents and passions.
- Throw a party for friends and family that you don’t see often enough. This will help take the edge off the loneliness.
- Get a dog. They are wonderful companions, and daily walks are good for both of you.
- Make sure you are taking advantage of all the military benefits available to you, providing assistance and information regarding insurance benefits and many other necessary programs open to families of both active and retired military personnel. All you need to do is register for them.
- If you have kids, that makes life apart from your spouse even more challenging. Spend real quality time with them as often as possible, and help them keep in touch frequently with the separated parent. They, too, are feeling the pain of separation.
- Treat yourself well. Go to that fancy restaurant you love but can only go to on rare occasions because it is so expensive. Hang the expense. You are worth it. You are also worth a new haircut, style and color, manicure, foot or whole-body massage.
- Do seek help if you need it, and accept that help. Remember always that no matter how long this particular separation is, it is a temporary situation.
The main thing for you and your kids to know is that you are up to the challenge. Keep yourselves busy in positive ways. You will get through this.
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